This is Brave

This is Brave: Baring my Scars to Save Lives

Original Blog: “Love the Skin You Were Given” June 26, 2019

Hi, it’s Amy Nichole here once again. The last time I shared my story with you was in June 2019. That was right after I had found out that my melanoma had returned not once, but twice! Since 2019, I’ve been seeing my oncologist every 3-6 months in addition to seeing my dermatologist every 3 months. Safe to say, I’ve had my share of appointments and tests since I last shared with you.  

Back in October 2019, my oncologist ran all kinds of tests including a full body PET Scan. With the melanoma coming back like it had, we needed to get a better picture of what we were facing. I also have family history of Breast, Melanoma, Cervical and Lung cancers so we tested for genetic cancer markers. I tested positive for two cancer markers which increases my risk for Breast, Ovarian, and Pancreatic Cancers. Following these tests, we knew what we might be up against, so I started getting proactive screenings for other cancers. More tests!

To add to the numerous battle wounds and scars, I already caried on my right arm and back, between Nov-Dec 2019 my dermatologist found more than 10 atypical spots, all of them ranging from questionable to severe and needing to be removed and tested. One of those spots had been considered ‘moderate’ in June 2018 and was left alone. It ended up growing back as Melanoma.

Since 2019, my outlook on life has changed significantly. I’ve become an advocate for skin cancer and do my best to educate others about protecting themselves from the sun. I’ve even started fundraising! In May 2019, I was able to raise $900 for skin cancer research, education and prevention. Between May and June 2020, I raised $1,000 with shirts I had designed to help increase awareness. Coolibar even helped provide the long-sleeved shirts for it!

I’ve also changed my habits. Since my initial diagnosis, I’ve gone from being carefree in tank tops and no hat, to wearing only UPF 50+ clothing. Coolibar has just about taken over my closet. I always wear sunscreen and have a hat and my Coolibar gloves on when I’m outside, no matter the weather. With the diagnosis and scares I have had, I know how important it is to keep yourself protected. I have even changed my diet, per my oncologist’s request, as a preventative measure. I’m pleased to say that all my test results were clear throughout 2020.

The downside of the past year was that my best friend Michelle, lost her battle with Pancreatic Cancer. She was initially diagnosed in May 2019 and passed away in on October 25th, 2020. She was with me in January of 2020 when I got the news that I was cancer-free for the first time since my first diagnosis. She never missed my appointments because she knew how much her support helped me through. She touched me deeply and I am forever changed. I’m so grateful to have been by her side in the last few days of her life. Seeing her go was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done,  but I’m glad I was by her side just like she had been for me. Rest in Peace Michelle! I love you forever and always my soul sister!

I’ve learned through all of this that beautiful things can come out of the darkest places. About a year before she passed in November 2019 Michelle received the news she was momentarily cancer free. We celebrated by doing a warrior portrait session. After she passed, her family looked to those photos for comfort as they celebrated her strength and resilience. They will forever be cherished by her family. She was a true warrior and will live on in the hearts of many people. Michelle inspired me to donate a warrior portrait session every year in her memory. It’s something I can keep giving to others to help them through when they need it. For that, I’m grateful.

Considering everything that I’ve been through, and continue to go through, I get asked for advice often. It tell people that it’s all about having a good plan with your team of doctors. Having everyone on the same page is so important. Being aware of your body is also extremely important. Ultimately, you are more likely to catch a sudden change, not your care givers. So, if you see something, say something! NEVER miss your skin checks and don’t be afraid to go in and ask your doctor to double-check something if it isn’t looking right. It is better to be safe than sorry as Melanoma or any form of cancer can come on suddenly and change quickly.

Most importantly, scars aren’t scary or anything we should hide. They’re a part of us. They help tell the story of how we’ve survived our battles. They’re what remind us of the pain we went through. Every new scar makes us stronger than the scar before it. They’re tough and courageous. They’re our war stories and our badges of strength. Be proud of your scars as some may not even be visible to the naked eye but are deep down inside of you. Don’t be ashamed and don’t be shy. Show your courage and strength along with your scars. Inspire someone. You may change someone’s life in more ways than one with your story as each battle is something so personal to learn from. 

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